Quest Bar Giveaway and Birthday Wishes

PicMonkey CollageApril 28 is quickly approaching. Time to kickoff the celebration with a Quest Bar giveaway sponsored by the company themselves. To get started, leave a comment below answering the question at the very end of this post (and if you want, tell me what your ideal birthday would be like if you could have it your way!). Look below for extra entries!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

You can also enter optionally through any one of these links:



Β My sweet 16 turned mighty sour last year, and I hope it doesn’t repeat again. Nothing went as I wanted it to. And like every year, (as expected of me), I have a huge birthday wishlist of electronics, gift cards, tea, and workout apparel. (Food doesn’t count! As much as I would enjoy the present, it wouldn’t last longer than a week before I devour it. My taste buds are pretty demanding! or maybe it’s my stomach that’s unforgiving). On totally different note, this month I can choose any free drink from Starbucks! Okay, so I want something low carb for sure, but what? Everything at Starbucks is just sugar on syrup on even more syrup. The only things I know that doesn’t have that much sugar is steeped tea and coffee, but how boring would that be? On my birthday? I wish their whipped cream could at least be sugar free, maybe then I could order a sugar free green tea frappachino.

I had this big wish of going to Europe for my 16th birthday. It seemed like such a big deal–turning 16. People threw big parties and wore beautiful dresses. I thought, why not go big too? So I saved up my money and never had parties for my 12,13,14, and 15th birthday, waiting for the big explosion that might happen at 16. And, well, time passed faster than I expected. Before I knew it, it was a month before my birthday before I realized I hadn’t planned anything for the trip at all–no friends, no plane ticket, no nothing. I didn’t think time would fly this fast. Deep inside, I still hoped something big would happen on my birthday, even if I didn’t go to Europe.

Yoga helps me calm down and center myself.

Yoga helps me calm down and center myself.

Well, it didn’t. Nothing happened. In fact, it was just a day like any other, except sadder. At special times like these, your family comes to comfort you, but I knew better that my family would do no such thing just because it was my birthday. My stupid, stupid, birthday.

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Do you have a habit of looking at things you wish you had but don’t? I do, especially online. I look at online grocers like Vitacost and made Amazon wish lists. Man, every time I walk into a Lululemon store I head straight to the sales section knowing I still wouldn’t purchase anything but it gave me something to marvel at for a few minutes.

…Above all, I just want to be happy.

Truly, utterly, and undeniably happy.Β  I want it to sweep me off my feet in a laughable embrace and fill my heart with so much joy I explode.

And nothing money buys can ever give me that.

I once found a quote on Tumblr that touched my heart:

“Find what it is that makes you happy…

…And let it kill you.”

I look back at pictures of myself young and still in middle school, where things started to fall apart. I mean, I’ve always dealt with bullying and things hit the fan when I was in grade 5. But grade 7 was when things took another turn.

Standing outside the YMCA in Daniel's hoodie and pikachu hat, waiting for a pickup ride.

A few years ago standing outside the YMCA in Daniel’s hoodie and pikachu hat, waiting for a pickup ride.

In Quebec city on a school trip, around the time a close friend started to drift away, not that I ever really felt like I fit in.

In Quebec city on a middle school trip, around the time a close friend started to drift away, not that I ever really felt like I fit in.

..but how did I become such a sad, sad person?

Why is that so difficult? Is it because I feel oppressed and feel like I deserve more than what life is giving me? I want to feel special for just this one day. I want to feel like I’m worth it. I want to feel unique, and for the first time in forever. at the same time, there’s a constant pull telling me to hold back, that I shouldn’t be spending precious money on any of that, that I should be saving up for something that matters more–my education. My parents have made it very clear that they are not happy with my career choice in arts and fitness, so they’ve decided not to further support me financially. I’ve been on my own since I was 13 or 14 and I guess I should have gotten used to it but I haven’t. Silly me.

I want so many things, and yet, I want nothing. I have a long wishlist, and yet somehow I know even if I had all of those things it would not make my life feel complete. I think what I want is something intangible, like a adjective. It’s something that can’t be bought. Support. Respect. Freedom.

I want to be there for my siblings. I want them to grow up differently than I. They are only 8 and 4 and have the world ahead of them. I made sure in January for my sister’s 8th birthday to make them a special treat. I can at least make someone else’s birthday special even if mine wasn’t, right?

She tries to keep a smile back but I knew she is really happy.

She tries to keep a smile back but I knew she is really happy.

I should aspire to be person I never had in my life–the personΒ  I desperately needed. Need.

I hope I can become that great person, and eventually learn to fall in love with myself.

“Don’t Forget to Fall in Love with yourself first…”

Tell me one thing you smiled at this week.

  • Rachelle

    One thing I smiled at this week was when my best friend brought back a pair of shoes that he and his mom bought for me on vacation! They’re totally out of my comfort zone, but I’m determined to make them work, just to make them happy. Anyone know how to style snake skin (just the pattern, not actual) flats??? Hahah!:)

  • Lori Beneteau

    I smile at my dogs every day. You just can’t beat their enthusiasm when you come home every day πŸ™‚

  • Figrareti

    I smiled to keep pushing my self to reach my goal. tried to convinced myself that i can do it and Its quite helpfull actually haha. Your story kinda similar with mine, I had those hard times too when it comes to birthday. But we should be more optimist rite! πŸ™‚

  • Erica Turner-brown

    I smile at all the beauty within the world. Living in such a privileged world i sometimes take things for granted. The laughter of my little sisters running through the house, the supportive amazing friends i surround myself around, the beginning of a new day and the ending of a terrible one, sunshine on such a beautiful day, the food that is placed in front of my on the table and finally myself.

    I take myself for granted, it has the power to evolve into such a magnificent person and i hold myself back. The thought of self love and empowerment makes me smile like the 16 year old girl i am, that one day i will accept myself for who i am along with everyone around me to see the greater beauty in the world rather then the environment they confine them selves too.

  • Jessie A

    I smile because I woke up each day happy and healthy.

  • Audrey H

    I smiled because my sister made my favorite paleo blueberry scones while I was at school and she saved me the bowl to lick πŸ™‚ It’s the little things haha! I also smiled because I am at a really good place in my life right now and I feel so blessed to be surrounded by such amazing people!

  • healthical

    I smiled at the fact that my family is all happy and healthy. Sure I come from a broken family and my family lives apart, but I still feel as though everyone is happy with current life. I seem to be able to understand myself more spiritually than ever before and am starting to realise who I truly am. I am on the path to finding my future and I won’t let anyone, even myself, hold me back from my future calling. I don’t know about you, but to me this makes me the happiest girl on this planet.

    Happy 16th by the way, you look stunning! May the following years of your life continue to be as great as they are now (:

  • Ursa

    I smiled because my family is reunited for a week πŸ™‚

  • Bone Jangles

    Wow… I can relate to the majority of this post :/ And I truly believe that you can do whatever you set your mind to <3 And for the question… Going out with my old friends made me smile… They moved away and we only communicate via Skype but we saw each other in person this week and it was like the old times and it made me really happy πŸ˜‰

  • Nicole

    I can totally relate to you for having a disappointing sweet 16. About a month after my birthday passed with nothing from my friends- no cards, gifts, not even a text, my best friend broke down in tears and told me that they had planned a party for me but the night before one of the girls I thought was my best friend cancelled it. I was so devastated, because they knew that I had been looking forward to my birthday for months (I was the youngest in my group, so I watched everyone else host big parties and wear beautiful gowns). It was heartbreaking but it made me realize who my true friends are and who I should make my priority. And for something that made me smile this week.. I spent the week looking for new homes with my family and one day, my cousins and I were playing wiffle ball and I heard one of them say, “man I can’t wait until we all love here and can do this every weekend!” It put the biggest smile on my face! I hope you had a good week too πŸ™‚

  • Katherine Downham

    I smiled at a baby whilst I was running today because he smiled and bobbed his head up and down as if he was cheering me on πŸ˜€

  • akvileeagle

    This week, I smiled a lot at the World. I just kind of started to appreciate the little things more πŸ™‚

  • nellie

    I smiled because I got an A on an assignment I had forgotten I submitted πŸ™‚

  • My

    Having suffered from eating disorder and depression for 5 years, one of the few things that makes me smile right now is to be able to look at myself in the mirror and actually smile.

  • Jackie

    One thing that has made me smile this week: the sun. I’m so thankful that the weather has been as beautiful as it has.

  • Imani

    I smiled because I just got accepted for an amazing internship, and I’m really excited about my future!! <3

  • Di

    Your post made me smile! And we’ve been getting sun in my area lately, so that’s another thing. You look so happy and healthy!

  • Grab Your Kicks

    I smiled because I just finished a long training run!

  • David

    I smiled because I found a cool blog

  • Rachel A

    I smiled when I found my john mellencamp cd

  • Sophie

    I smiled because I finally saw progress in the mirror – hard work pays off!!

  • Jennifer Brender

    My best friend in the world makes me smile every day!!

  • Olivia Post

    I turned 20 yesterday – so leaving my teen years behind made me smile a little bit πŸ˜€

  • Lara

    I smiled at my best friend because I really love her.

  • Mary

    I smiled at the sunrise during my long run!

  • Anna

    I smiled when I was on top of a beautiful mountain in Chang Mai! I went mountain biking with my school and it was absolutely amazing!!!

  • Liza

    I smiles at this page as a beautiful and young person reminded me to take a step back, look at the bigger picture, and enjoy the moment πŸ™‚

    Liza *

  • Vanessa Leighton

    I smiled when I lost some weight πŸ™‚

  • Raquel S.

    I smiled today looking at photo of my mom, she passed away a couple of months ago I been really depressed about it and could not look at photos of her without being sad… But I think I am starting to get better, I started looking at her photos today and remembering all the good moments we had and it made me smile for the first time in a long time.

  • Agnete Schou

    I smiled because I got to hang out with my best friend πŸ™‚

  • Rebecca B.

    I smiled at all of the beautiful flowers that are blooming right now!

  • Flo

    I smiled at my boyfriend making me low carb snacks.

  • blflak

    I smiled because today because my 3 y/o son smiled at m (he also told me I was beautiful).

  • katy

    I smiled because my daughter gave me a hug and a kiss

  • Andrea Burgoa

    I smiled at finally fitting into a shirt I had been given as a gift over a year ago!

  • Aki Chan

    I smiled this week because I made a cake (specifically an oreo cheesecake) for my brother’s birthday (yay to birthdays!) and he actually said “thank you” and said it was (really) good! and that made me smile because we don’t really have the best relationship but when stuff like this happen I can’t help but express that warm, fuzzy feeling inside through a smile! πŸ™‚ and hope you had a wonderful birthday! πŸ™‚

  • Victoria

    I smiled because of the beautiful weather πŸ™‚

  • Jennie

    I smiled because I didn’t wake up sick this morning like I thought I might.

  • Trish Trubl

    I smiled after I finished an amazing hike πŸ™‚

  • Jacqueline Sullivan

    I smiled because of this gorgeous weather! And my best friend is staying at my house for 2 nights.

  • Anne Krarup

    I couldn’t stop smiling after my run the day before yesterday. It wasn’t just a run like any other run. I have been struggling with injuries for years – a thigh injury that turned into a MCL tear. For a long time I though I had to give up running complete, because I keep getting knee pain shin splints. But after I started barefoot running, I’ve made so much progress, and for my last run, I did 3km in 20 minutes! (walking a bit and running) It’s not impressive for most, but I’m so proud of myself for never giving up. I still can’t stop smiling because of it! πŸ™‚

  • I smiled because I was chosen to test out this game I love now that it’s moving to PC. I know it’s nerdy and lame, but I’m really excited ;D

  • Eryn

    I smiled because I finished a workout without quitting before it was over ahh!

  • Chantal

    I smiled when i got my new running shorts πŸ™‚

  • Veronica

    I smiled because I passed my taekwondo test this week. πŸ™‚

  • Tessa Bridger

    My cute dogs! Corgis make you smile!

  • Andrea Mason

    I teach Kindergarten. Today one of my students asked me for something. I said “in just one second.” He said “One. ehhhhh…it’s been one second!” I cracked up laughing. My 5 years olds say the funniest things sometimes!

  • desiree

    I smiled at my half marathon PR πŸ™‚

  • Seniaaa

    I smiled because I got to spend time with my family πŸ™‚

  • Erin

    I smiled this week because my brother arrived home unannounced for an impromptu visit. It’s the first time my entire family has been under one roof since early March and it is just fabulous to have everyone together again. I haven’t stopped smiling since he came through the door.

    My ideal birthday would be to do something totally adventurous and out of character with my closest friends. Perhaps hang-gliding, or going up in a hot air balloon :).

  • Chan Qy

    I smiled while having a dinner together with my family last Friday. It was rare as everyone seems to be so busy during this period.

  • Aurica Ch

    I smiled because my exams are finally over!! :)))))

  • Carly Jor

    I smiled when my brother came home from a long trip. I felt truly happy to see him again

  • Elsie Goycoolea

    I smiled because my baby doggie just found out he has a tail and thinks it is his new toy…:)
    My ideal birthday would need to have three things: friends, family and sweets. As for the rest I would just want it to be special and full of surprises…

  • Kirsty @ My Home Truths

    I smiled watching Eurovision tonight – so much fun!

  • Christina Russell

    I smiled because my 3 year old finally tried and liked an apple!!

  • jillconyers

    The Cookies and Cream bar is amazing! I smiled during my long run today. Just because I was running πŸ™‚

  • nat

    I smiled today because i’ve been struggling with my weight and trying to lose a lot and found out ive lost 13lbs already!

  • Kierston

    My Teddy Bear. He makes everyone smile πŸ˜€

  • Agnetha Foong

    I smiled when my cat climbed into my lap and curled up there, purring.

  • Fitn Healthy

    This week i smiled because i am one step closer to recovering once and for all!

  • Joni J Caraway

    I smiled at my grandchildren this weekend when they came to stay a few days with me.

  • I smiled (and laughed) at a funny snapchat my husband sent me, haha.

  • Anna

    I smiled because my brother and his girlfriend were talking about wedding plans when we were out for dinner πŸ™‚

  • Cierrah R.

    I smiled because my 21 year old brother came home from college today. He is my fitness inspiration and lately I’ve had difficulty enjoying work outs, but he told me we are going to the gym together tomorrow. I can’t wait to get back on track πŸ™‚

  • Laura Charlotte Marie Bilas

    Finishing training after 7 weeks for my new job! πŸ™‚

  • yesenia

    I smiled because I saw my family πŸ™‚

  • Savmos

    I smiled because I realized how thankful and blessed I am to have recovered from my eating disorders, I’ve struggled with for about six years.

  • julie

    My sweet 16 is coming up and the best present i could possibly receive is Quest Bars πŸ™‚ Love your blog! Keep it up πŸ™‚

  • Alyson

    I smiled today knowing, that it’s a new day that we can all try to better ourselves and even the day of others who may not be having a good day.

  • Abigail

    I smiled because of the pretty flowers!

  • Chloelynn152

    I smiled t my son because he makes me so damn proud.

  • Matheus Fontinele

    One thing that made me smile was when I received a hug of my mom πŸ™‚

  • savannah

    I smiled because I reconnected with a friend whom I haven’t talked to since freshman year!!

  • Becky

    I smiled when I got an A on my paper I worked all week on πŸ™‚ happy birthday love!

  • Courtney

    I had a really bad day today at school and once I came home, I flipped threw my Afrikaans textbook and my classmate left multiply messages on random pages. One in particular was, “I think you are special”. This made my day

  • Mary

    I smiled because it is finally above 40 degrees where I live!

  • Helena

    I smiled when I had a fight with my best friend. I thought he had replaced me for another best friend. But at the end he said that there was no one above me and that I can always count on him. That was actually the nicest thing he said to me ever because normally he’s messing and joking around with me

  • Tristan Elliot

    I smiled when my homemade bread came out risen instead of flat!

  • Sarah

    I smiled when I aced a test on Week 1 of a course I’m doing online. Feeling accomplished!

  • Celine

    I smiled when I rode my bike and smiled at a girl, and then she had the cutest and biggest smile ever!

  • Yesenia

    I smiled because I saw my family (:

  • Morgan

    I smiled because an old friend said hello to me. We haven’t spoke. In years and had a bad falling out, but she smiled and said hi. It made me feel like I belonged again. I’ve isolated myself so much over the last little while, and it felt great to reconnect in such a some way.

  • Reem

    I smiled at how I can now do 3 full pushups when I literally could do none a week ago! Huge accomplishment :DD

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